Roll on Winter

Pah! Load of rejections this week- nothing being taken. Ah well, at least I'm being consistent with previous Spring/Summer months. Looking at my records I can see that May, June, July have always been pretty dry months cartoon wise. But, look on the bright side- having no money means I don't have to worry about what to do with it- result!!

This was one of my many rejections from the Spring-Summer doldrums 2 years ago

Giles Wemmbley-Hogg

Here's the other cartoon I have in the Reader's Digest- don't even try to compete with my cartoon gag writing genius with this one- leave it ahht, you plum!

Many years ago I wandered about a few countries. I was one of those annoying people who, when asked what interests they had, would say stuff like, “yah, well, y’know, I’m a ‘traveller’- I’m into travelling.”
Pff!
Yeah- going on holiday- who doesn’t like doing that?
Eventually I realised it was all about one-upmanship, and how your journey to ‘The Beach’ had to be that bit more complicated and uncomfortable than your fellow traveller. Thankfully I came to my senses, and would still travel to ‘The Beach’, but I’d take a direct flight from Gatwick and rent a nice hotel room. I’d mix with Flossie and Charles from Marlborough ('yah, like, we've got this reeeely cool cheap hut to live in- it's in the middle of the garbage dump-just 3 rupees per week'), and be amazed at how they’d argue with the locals over the equivalent of 5 pence for their freshly cooked fish curry.
Oh, and the trendy parents dragging their poor infants about.. see above

Win things!

Once again one of my cartoons is being used for the Reader’s Digest caption competition.
This is what they say on their website:

“Think of a witty caption for this picture and you could beat the comedy experts at their own game. The three best suggestions will be posted on our website in by 10th May alongside an anonymous caption from our professional cartoonist. Visitors can choose their favourite, and if your entry gets the most votes, you'll receive £100 and the original, signed drawing”

You’ll find the competition here
http://www.readersdigest.co.uk/caption.html

says nothing to me about my life

I’m a bit rubbish at drawing. Without the aid of computer trickery and endless digital ‘undo’s’ my limitations are revealed. So, fed up with this inability to do stuff ‘live’, last night I started an evening class for Painting and Drawing. All I can say is that I will not be posting on this blog the abominations produced.

So- back to the cartoons- I have a couple in the current Private Eye- one ripping off a rather good artist, L.S.Lowry, and his scenes of working life in 1950’s Salford.
It’s a bit niche, this one- you have to know about how the BBC are moving some of their departments up to a new glossy location in Salford- and how some London based staff have been grizzling about it.
The magazine often pokes fun at media types, so I had a hunch they might publish it- and for once I was proved right.

No cartoon day

It's the Easter holidays and loads of people I know are wandering around interesting places- Italy, Greece, Denmark...
Hah! Fools! I stayed at home and basked in the hottest day of the year so far- rounding the day off with a last minute barbecue, using one of those disposable things you get at the supermarket.
Things went downhill rapidly- I hadn't taken into account the creatures from down the road.

Ninjas at two O'clock.


Classic pincer movement- confuse the enemy (me)


Attack! Attack! Attack!


I couldn't eat another thing.


Yum- thanks- but more chicken next time- cheers.

Strange fruit

Plink plinky plink plink, goes the ukulele- there's a bit of whistling too usually. The advert on the telly then shows an animated strawberry and/or banana pirouetting about, as a bland non threatening voiceover artist says something irritating like "Hullo. Fruit is ace. Honest. We thought we'd share our love of fruit with you. Here’s a drink we made by squishing fruits- Hope you like it (simper). We make it in a shed in our garden. Look, a fluffy bunny hops about the garden. It thinks fruit is rather ace too, don't you, fluffy wuffy? Tra la la- hello trees, hello sky..."
Plink plinky plink plink...

Pah!
We all know what the truth is - we all know that MegaChemGloboFoodIncCorp Industries(Brazil) bought you out years ago.

(This one made its way into the Australian version of The Spectator magazine.)

This ain't Rock n Roll, this is...

Got home from work early today- it's nice and sunny so I thought I'd have a hack at the overgrown garden. Five minutes later I got bored and tired and had a cup of tea instead.

More exciting instalments to come later, thrillseekers!