Happy birthday JC

Here's the design Private Eye magazine chose for one of their Christmas cards.

Merry Christmas!!!

Krampus is a coming

Almost Christmas- but with daffodils springing up and people waddling around in T-shirts and shorts you might think otherwise.

So here are some Christmassy pictures to get you in the festive mood!

This one is in the latest Private Eye magazine.

This next one was a rejected card design for Private Eye.

It's a modern take on The Snowman by Raymond Briggs.

(I'll admit it's a bit bleak, even for me)

Daktari

Not well today- think I am catching the cold everyone at work has.

I guess Christmas time is all about sharing, but I would have preferred some chocolate biscuits as a gift.

But I am not one to grumble- so here's a cheery festive image for you.

I sent it to Private Eye, along with 4 other drawings, when they asked for Xmas card ideas a few months back.

It was rejected.

They did take one of my other designs, but this was my favourite.

If it confuses you, think back to that story earlier this year when a dentist shot a lion.

Event Horizon

3 cartoons in the latest Private Eye magazine- woo hoo!

Now I'll be able to afford one of those really big Pot Noodles for Christmas dinner this year.

God bless us, every one!

This one won't mean much to those unfamiliar with the UK TV show 'Gogglebox'.

Or if you can't work out what that spinny dark circular thing is meant to be.

The original text was going to end with, "...creating a black hole- where time and space become meaningless."

But that would be too long a caption- even for me.

Purgatory Street

I've been elsewhere...

Say hello to my neighbour- just across the road in the borough of the Holy Apostles.

I'm back now though.

Some cartoons might follow soon.

Plum Duff

I've spent the past couple of weeks wrestling with festive wrapping paper and turkey dinners- well, in my mind at least.

It's that time of year when Private Eye magazine asks for ideas for their Christmas cards.

In the past I've had one or two taken.

I'm not so sure about the ideas I came up with this year-  man, a couple of them are bleak...

So- let's not dwell on that- instead here's a fluffy cartoon from last week's Spectator magazine.

(maybe that's an Xmas pud being baked/destroyed ??)

Kevin McCloud

I go up to that London a fair bit- have done for many years.
It's been getting quite tall recently.

A cartoon in The Oldie magazine.

I dream of Jeannie

A while ago I tried my hand at the 3D arts.
It was meant to be a Minotaur reading a book.
I ran out of the air-drying clay, so it became a (poorly sculpted) Minotaur without hands or the bull's head (which I guess is the important bit for representing a Minotaur).

Fast forward about 3 years, and I try my hand at watch repairs. It was a cheap but cool looking 1970's era LED digital watch.
The market stall owner on the Golborne road said he couldn't guarantee it working, so I got hold of it for a fiver and took it home.
With great skill, and some solvent, I was able to ease out the ancient corroded battery and replace it with a nice and shiny fully charged one.
With great ham-fistedness I then unintentionally destroyed the printed circuit board with a screwdriver.
So close...
Pah!

So, two half a**ed objects-  put them together with a bit of blutack and what do you get?
(and with the addition of some books from a charity shop)

Tour de France

I had a hack about in my garden the other day.
Something odd was jutting out of a rather overgrown patch.
I grabbed hold and pulled.
And pulled.
And pulled.

Just needs a new inner tube I reckon.

Snake Oil

I can't recall exactly when I came up with the idea for this cartoon, but it was many years ago.

Ever the industrious get-up-and-go chap that I am I only just drew it last month.

It is in this week's Spectator magazine.

I reckon there must have been some news story at the time about alternative treatments and medicines becoming available on the National Health Service.

I originally was going to have just the standard doctor type coming up with the line, but decided to try a new-age hippy type character.

I dunno now. Is it over-egging the gag a bit?

Ah, well- it sold, so I should let it go.

"A Horrible Life Un-ruined and then Re-ruinated a Lot"

I have a few cartoons floating around in a couple of publications right now.

This one I started to draw without having any idea what the caption might be.

What's it about?

I dunno- something about how fat kids are these days, I guess.

Or how self-centred, and without compassion or empathy some can be.

I'm sure they're not all like that though.

But with their smooth skin, optimism and general lack of down-troddeness by not yet realising the utter futility of life, they are worthy targets of mockery.

Bottom of the barrel

Couple of cartoons in this week's Spectator magazine.

This one I have been dreading seeing in print.

I made a mistake in the drawing.

In my defence, I realised what I had done when finishing off the drawing and amended the error. I then decided I wanted to change the colouring slightly. I accidentally re-coloured the wrong version and popped that one in the post.

Anyway, here it is.

Can you see what is wrong?
Here's the 'correct' version. Spot the difference...

Floral Ashley

Hmm...what happened there? Where did May go?

No posts for ages- no excuses- just not drawn much.

Getting back in the groove a bit more lately though.

Here's one of mine from the current issue of Private Eye.

Spiral pasta

Another art themed (shameless rip-off) cartoon from the latest 'Oldie' magazine.

Reference material here:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Nightmare

(And no, that is not Les Dawson in the middle)

Arthur Fallowfield

Spring is sprung

The answer lies in the soil, apparently.

Time to hit the garden centre?

Not for me- although this one looks like it could be a fun place to visit

A cartoon in last week's Private Eye.

Reference material here:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Garden_of_Earthly_Delights

Arthur Negus

Sunday night.
BBC1
Some things never change.

But at least they got rid of 'That's Life' years ago.
That theme tune still brings back the 'I've not done my homework yet!' terrors.

This cartoon is in the current Spectator.

Asmodeus

‘Tis a beautiful Sunday afternoon.

The early spring sunshine makes the drabness of winter a dim memory.

I am indoors drawing.

On BBC6 Music Jarvis Cocker is reading an excerpt from Bret Easton Ellis's book 'Lunar Park’, where the child's Terby doll is exhibiting disturbing demonic traits.

I look out through the patio doors to the garden.

A darkness envelopes me.

Next door's cat is outside.

He looks at me- his eyes burning with a hateful malevolence.

I normally like cats, but this one is not right in the head.

His name I know, but I refuse to acknowledge what his owners call him.

To me he is Asmodeus.

What's all this got to do with cartoons?

Well, here is a cat cartoon- I think it has appeared on the blog as a "here's one I couldn't sell".

It finally got published in Saga magazine this month- about 3 years after I drew it.

Moby

It's been a bit quiet on the cartoon front again.

I blame one of my colleagues for introducing me to 'VirtualDJ' software.

I won't inflict the sonic horrors I have created on you gentle blog readers.

In the meantime...

I have entered one of my cartoons to a cartoon competition.

Here:

http://limes-net.com/contest/

Mine is in there somewhere.

Not sure my simple black n white line drawing fits in with the other colourful cartoons on show.

We shall see.

Goodbye Jumbo

Here's a rare beast- the lesser spotted new Len cartoon.

From this week's Spectator magazine.

Blast from the past

News report today- smoking in cars carrying children to become illegal in UK from Oct 1st.

Cartoon on this blog back in 2010- it appeared in The Spectator magazine:

Maybe I should send it in again- change the 'If' to 'when'.
Recycling is the green thing to do.

All of this is a lie

Hello- sorry for lack of posts.

I've been a bit busy.

Do you have ANY idea how many funny cat videos there are on youtube?

And 80's pop videos?

They're kinda distracting.

Anyway-

First post of the new year- a cartoon I can't sell.

Isn't working from home great?

I'm not allowed to, but it does mean no one shows up to the office on Friday- makes my life in a tech support role so much easier...

Ring ring

“Hello? OK...so the laptop catches fire when you press the wireless button? Hmmm...Let me look that up on the knowledgebase...Nah, can't sort that out remotely- I'll have to schedule this one for Monday- Cheers!"

Click

"Cup of tea anyone?"