One for all you chondrichthyologists

With some of my cartoons I find myself wanting to explain the gag to people- I worry that the idea isn't obvious, and I end up saying stuff like, "well, this is supposed to be ....and that means...so the joke is..."
This is usually followed by an exasperated reply of "Yeah, it's ok- I did get it- I’m not daft, you know!"

However, with one of my cartoons, I thought that despite being accepted by a magazine the joke must have been too obscure for publication, because it never appeared in print.
Back in 2008 I came up with the following, and it's only now in 2010 that it's finally seen the light of print, in the latest issue of Reader's Digest.

Geddit?

That's gotta hurt

The latest issue of Prospect magazine has a cartoon of mine that I came up with ages ago. I was worried that it might have had passed its sell-by-date, but I suppose the current Iraq inquiry taking place in London makes it a bit more topical.

The phrase 'battle for hearts and minds' has been used quite a lot over the past few years, relating to a variety of theatre of operations in hot, dusty countries (weren't they called 'wars' once upon a time? I don’t recall BATTLE comic having stories called 'Tommy Cockles and the Theatre of Operations against the Hun’ …Tommy's gun spat lead! “Nein, Nein! Aiieee, Gott in Himmel!").
I digress. Here's the cartoon-

I'm not sure if I drew it as an attempt at satire, or if I just wanted to draw a Viking\head on a stick cartoon.

Witty title

Have you ever seen those American sitcoms where they pad out a whole show with clips of previous episodes? The characters, sitting in a coffee shop/bar/death row, say things like, 'hey, what about when Bobby Jo did...' cue wobbly special effect as a clip of season 1 episode 3 comes up. Well, I feel that's what this blog has been like lately- full of padding and not much new stuff. So, it’s good news for the blog and my wallet as I've recently I've had a few cartoons accepted and they're slowly coming out in print- about time too!

Private Eye magazine has a couple in their latest issue. One of them was a complete surprise because they had told me it had been rejected. Although it was good to see it in print it could have resulted in the ultimate cartoonist faux pas- what if I’d sent it on to another mag and they also printed it... the same gag in two magazines? I'd have been drummed out of the cartoonist's community probably. Just as well all the other mags rejected it.

Here’s one of the cartoons.

The inspiration for this being the TV shows a friend makes me watch when she visits- Sex and the City; Gok Wan’s ‘Look At Me I’m Starkers’; Ugly Betty etc etc. OK, I might pretend to huff and puff, and say ‘The Sweeney is on ITV10’, but, secretly I enjoy them too- they often feature some quite fit babes- what is there to complain about? Oh- and they resulted in this cartoon- result.

More upside down cartoons

Just found out another one of my cartoons has appeared in the Australian version of The Spectator. It's nice to know that my scribblings are travelling to the colonies, but it's a bit much to think that while the gentlemen in this gag are enjoying what I suspect to be gorgeous sunny antipodean weather, muggins who drew them is still shivering in arctic conditions.

I should point out to those not in the UK that we're experiencing an unusually harsh cold snap at the moment. If you live somewhere like Canada this would probably be a light dusting of snow for you, but over here it's caused scenes straight out of your average post apocalyptic disaster movie. When the snow hit, all 8 inches of it, streets were devoid of people and cars- if you ventured out with tennis racquets tied to your feet you would find yourself in a whiteout world of silence and stillness. Around each corner you’d expect to see zombies shuffling about- with vacant dead eyed expressions, slack jawed drool soaked chins, and muttering 'brains...brains...' To be honest though, this happens in my town most Saturday nights, so it wouldn't be that much of a change.

Anyway- here's the gag.

You would think that the expression ‘rats with wings’, maligning the feral pigeon, has been around forever, but hours of research (2 minutes on google) seem to point to it being made up by Woody Allen, in the screenplay for his film ‘Stardust Memories’ from 1980. Must be true- t’internet says so.

If I'd drawn this gag years ago no doubt the sign on the gate would be something like 'Genetic Engineering lab', but I thought I'd bring it up to date with the Stem Cell thing- I have no idea about Stem Cell research, so for all I know this might not make any sense at all, but at least the cartoon editor liked it!

Global warming

What about this snow then?

Kids today! All the schools closed?

Pah! When I were a kid we'd set off on our walk to school at midnight, to ensure we'd be there on time for morning assembly prayers. Rosy red cheeks aglow we'd knock back a glass of rum at morning break and run around the playground in pants and vests, laughing at the arctic blizzard engulfing us. Never did us any harm- apart from the alcoholism and the amputations due to frostbite.

Modern day mollycoddling is all due to the cartoonist’s friend, 'Health and Safety', apparently. Head teachers close the schools to avoid litigious parents suing because Tabitha and Tarquin fell over on the ice. Good idea- let them out n about and get up to some proper mischief instead.

(Sorry for the lack of posts recently- not much to report really- Xmas is a quiet time for the magazines, and I've been busy breaking computer networks. But I have had a couple of gags accepted recently, so I'll post them as n when they appear in print)